Blind Fury

I'm not one to talk about how someone should or shouldn't act. I've never acted very properly. I'm actually really, truly an asshole. I don't care about most of the things other people care about. I can't. I don't want to. I stopped wanting to when I realized that it doesn't matter. But let me explain something about wisdom, and decency, and friendship, and what is good, and what is just plain unspeakably cruel.

I understand the need to settle down. I've realized it's something I can't do. I've tried. I won't try again. I understand the urge to start a family, to leave some legacy behind. Especially if you're living a life that can call you away from your home, your loved ones, your friends with little notice.

Six months is long enough to know. Six months is a long time. Six months is long enough to know that if you will be leaving, you do not try and start a committed relationship. You may be the absolute best person, full of goodness, full of all that is true, and right, and kind. But by getting involved with a person, making them believe that you'll be around, and then explaining to them that even though you said "I'll be here, I want this", and really have that person believing it, and in love with you, and then a week later, after playing the games you play, you say "Oh, by the way, my reserve unit is probably going to be deployed overseas in six months", you are not worth anything.

I get that you volunteered to put your life on the line for this country. I understand that you have a duty. But all that is meaningless now. You've fucked my friend. You hurt her. And maybe you would have been worth waiting for if you hadn't have let her fall for you so fast by playing your silly games straight out of "How to Nail a Chick 101".

And even if your uninspired, limp-dicked dates and flowers and cute little text messages, and the fact that you probably are pretty good at fucking, even if boring, all made her completely fall in love with you, and actually believe that going off to war is honorable, you knew you wouldn't be around.

You fucking knew before you started in on her. You fucking knew. Units do not get deployed overnight. And you fucking knew before you met her that you would be leaving. You took advantage of her in an absolutely disgusting way. You are going to burn in a very special level of hell, a level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater.

I hope you're proud, soldier boy. You've sure shown what you're made of.

Fuck you. In this life and in all that may come. Fuck you from the depths of all that I am, all that I'll ever be, now and forever. You are worthless. You have dishonored yourself and any possible honor you might deserve by serving.

In short, fuck you.